Understanding How The Brain Works
First, lets get scientific. What is Serotonin? Why is it important for us to achieve and feel the high vibes?
Serotonin is The Happiness Hormone. It sends signals between your nerve cells. The important thing about Seratonin is that it supplies you with happy moods, emotional stability and focused energy. Some people uses prescribed medicines to uptake their Seratonin. These are people who have been diagnosed medically with depression. Some other handful people refuses to take drugs and turn into holistic health or healing remedies by venturing into a spiritual journey, that allowed them to understand their state of well being.
I must inform you that I am not a medical professional and that this course is a content compiled from my experiences of dealing with the polar opposite of void of serotonin in my life, due to traumatic events that piled my happiness into moodiness and sadness.
Serotonin become my focus as I understood why my brain becomes quite sabotaging to my desires, fulfillment and well being. I have been a high vibe woman, risk taking, adventure seeking, world traveling, goal making, future planning, dream achieving person. I lack Serotonin, after dealing with many events as an Adult that is unique, outstanding, special, and surrounded by people who were excited, but did not fully support my unique vision, unique personality and unique identity. My Serotonin became Cortisols.
The Adrenaline that use to funnel my excitement, turned the energy that use to be high vibes of Dancing Serotonin, became to a low vibe and stressful and moody Cortisols.
Cortisol is a stress hormone, and it happens when you worry, have too much stress, going through a period of chaos, trials and tribulations in your life. Anxiety also increases your Cortisol levels that affects your mood, memory, and metabolism.
So now you understand that Serotonin is The Happiness Hormone and Cortisol is The Stress Hormone.
Lets ask you a Question, Between the Number 1 – 10 What number would you gage your Seratonin? Happy Hormone, just by gut instincts. Evaluate your current view of your state of wellbeing and life conditions. How satisfied are you with your self and life. Number 1 is Lowest and Number 10 is Highest.
Low Serotonin 1__2__3__4__5__6__7__8__9__10 High Seratonin
Now, second Question. Between the Number 1 – 10 What number would you gage your Cortisol? Stress Hormone, just by gut instincts. Evaluate your current view of your state of well being and life conditions. How stressed are you with yourself and life. Number 1 is the Lowest and Number 10 is the Highest.
Low Cortisol 1__2__3__4__5__6__7__8__9__10 High Cortisol
If you have the numbers close to Low Serotonin and number to High Cortisol, then it applies to you that you are less happy and much stressed.
If you have medium seratonin to high seratonin but also numbers close to high cortisol, you are juggling with peaks of happiness but also stressful times jumbled into that happiness.
Okay now I need to continue with telling you another Scientific name called the GABA Neuron. The GABA Neuron, is a neurotransmitter in the nervous system. This neuron yells to the other cells to stop the serotonin and dopamine hormones from being produced. Increase amount of GABA neuron stops the Good Moods to form. Instead the GABA Neuron will yell to the other brain cells, that it is dangerous and the increase of Cortisols, anxiety and stress will appear.
Dopamine is a hormone that vibes Love and Passion. From my understanding, Dopamine is a state of rewarding feeling and Seratonin is a spike above Dopamine that gives fulfilling and satisfying joy. Seratonin is the peak of the summit of joyful hormones and Dopamine is the journey to Seratonin.
GABA neuron will tell the cells in your brain, wether to connect the Serotonin and Dopamine or Cortisols. When Cortisol hormones are not flushed out and released, it turns into ACTH and increases stress in the immune system.
GABA neuron is like a decision maker, it chooses to tell your brain to relax, or to stress. So Dopamine & Seratonin as well as Cortisol & ACTH this channel of positive and negative energy that shuts one flow and opens the other, is controlled by the GABA neuron.
ACTH is another form of Cortisol that forms in excess of stress.
So the Adrenaline goes into GABA neuron and it decides where the energy must go. Wether to secrete the cortisol hormones or the dopamine/serotonin hormones. The Adrenaline rush that goes into GABA is dictated by few key points. Positive rush or Negative Rush. Safety or Danger.
This is where the brain gets hijacked and distorted.
Let me tell you about the term safety and danger and the brain’s function.
Your GABA neuron has been hijacked and confused. It is not able to feel safe in situations that brings you pleasure. It is twisted to feel danger in situations that brings you happiness.
How did this happen? Well, the culprit to this is that your GABA Neuron picks up on the surrounding frequency, in your environment, or the people who surrounds you. The culprit hijack your GABA Neuron, and jerks it to feel danger in safe environment and to feel safe in dangerous environment. Your GABA Neuron tells the other cells in your mind that its not safe to be relaxed, so it increases in quantity and it stops the produce of serotonin and dopamine.
To explain this I will have to walk you through, the situation where the term “Gaslighting” occurs. Here you will understand a few terms to do with “Narcissists”, “Sociopaths” and “Idealization phase” “Trauma bonding”.
Your brain has been conditioned or manipulated in some part of your life. I was able to reach my high vibes and achieving sets of my dreams until a few years back. I have conquered two stressful events in my life and this is my third conquer, victory and triumph to excel beyond my darkest despair, hollowest moments and agonizing griefs.
As a child, my environment was toxic, as well as the people who surrounds me. Growing up as a scapegoat did not allow me to express my unique identity fully. So I kept my unique expression under wraps and only reveal my unique creative expression to the people whom I can trust. My brain understood danger, and understood that certain environment is dangerous to reveal my authenticity. Whereas some controlled environment to the people I have learn to trust and care about, allowed me to bloom positively and infinitely and unconditionally loving and accepting.
My childhood can discern and adapt to my environment, while protecting my brain and mind from “gas-lighting”.
Gas-lighting is a manipulation by psychological means to erode one from their sanity. Its a mental conditioning to train someone to behave or adapt a negative behaviour so to lessen its ability to impress others positively. Its also to suggest and influence one to question their capabilities, their reality and their emotional truth and conscience.
I grew up with toxic environment created by my Narcissistic Mother. A Narcissistic parent is possessively close to their children and may be especially envious of and threatened by their children’s growing independence. I understood my mother’s behaviour was abnormal and not healthy the way I compare it to other friends mothers who can show loving care and concern towards their children. Being loved by someone else’s mother was a dose of Serotonin to me. A surge of happy and warmth feeling belonged to that group of people was really nice.
I left home at age 19 and I went into the scariest places with a strategic plan to liberate myself from the Oppression of a Psychologically Violent Home. I had courage, a bold risk-taking game, and strong will to survive. To me at that age, strangers land or the exposure of being outside and not inside a abusive home was what will protect me. I survived 1 year plus alone until I realise I was trauma bonded to a relationship that was very toxic. I have attracted a relationship that on the not so surface revealed characteristics that resembles my Narcissistic Father.
I had to make a decision as a matter of psychological survival and I knew I could survive it being around the Narcissistic Family members, so I chose to go back home. I had to show power as I was getting physically abused by my brother and got the police involved. After my family members knew I was not joking, they left me alone, and I survive this tragedy. I was able to pursue my passion, creativity and build a strong and powerful untouchable identity. Until the lines were blurred and the boundaries of kindness and good intentions was rubbed in the mud with fake concerns and toxic inputs masked as a motherly advice entered my stream of consciousness as I was struggling with the after affect of having my strong boundaries and identity corroded by toxic female narcissist who starts to shift and gaslight my reality and twist my positive strengths and create a negative weakness in replacement of it.
My Narcissistic Mother implanted a woman in my life that was insidious and violent, this change the entire game. It was through guilt and threat that she made me responsible to befriend with a female narcissist that took all of my time, energy, focus, attention, self love and self worth and pride, basically everything she could perceive to take, she took. This was my Narcissistic Mother’s attempt to erase my unique success by being a unique person that is getting a lot of spotlight, success and money in doing my local business. She had a massive way of pulling me back into her life, with a lot of sympathy plots, guilt, delayed fulfilling of promises. My first gut instinct when I saw her after my Narcissistic Mother recommended me to see her (twice) I felt a strong urge to repel away from her. Then I was sucked into a black hole, because she entered into my life through association with my Narc Mother, and through the ploy of emotional guilt, to “help”. Guilt can open doors to many negative circumstances and situations in life that is not your responsibility. Act of Kindness should not be coming from a forced feeling and trapped circumstances where you dont’ even know you are sucked into it.
Imagine an athlete who has worked hard all of their life, to be strong, capable and durable in times of distress and challenges. This athlete knows his or her limits. But, due to the sudden changes of the environment, the athlete starts getting different signals of his or her limits. As the big event comes closer, the environment becomes thicker in alarms blaring with different signals. The mental state of the athlete’s reality is distorted, and the athletes strengths’ become his or her weakness. This athlete has been brainwashed, gas-lighted and reality shifted to be one of nightmare. They press the button of courage within their soul, and all they get is coward. They press the button of intensity within their soul, all they get is bleeps of nothingness. They try to feel emotions, and all they get from their soul is blankness.
When your environment that is toxic, cannot win, by physically abusing you to intimidate you. When your environment is toxic and cannot win, by negatively and verbally abusing you to make you doubt your capabilities. When your environment is toxic and cannot win, by being psychologically abusive and change your positive perspectives about the world, life, and yourself.
When your environment cannot get to you because you have survival mechanism that understood physical, verbal, and psychological abuse. Your toxic environment may use the last resort of masking their evil intention to destroy your light, happiness, serotonin, high vibes, joy and peace by being nice, being loving, being caring, being helpful, being generous, being all the names of virtues you can find, and faking it. Underneath the demeanor of virtues shown, the depth of the intention is masked as dangerous, insidious and callous. Your brain will register all this surface virtues as safe, but your heart will become anxious, panicky, increased rate of heart beat, and your physiological response will start to fire signals to your body that it is not safe, but because the toxic environment now controls your attention, mind and focus, you start losing motor reflex and your mind is captured to be sucked into the lewd delusion and nasty distortion of the abuser’s plot to destroy your light, high vibes and serotonin. You will end up with a lot of adrenaline energy converting into cortisols, stress hormone.
Your body may recuperate after that bloody attack by feeling drained in the presence of someone you have just met or spend time with. Your body did not produce dopamines, the love hormone or serotonin, the happy hormones. Your body has a language if you can connect your mind to the state and well being of your body, you will understand that if your body is uptight, clenching, stiff and your back is not relaxed, your body is in a fight and flight mode, a survival mechanism is agitated. Your shoulders are in a defensive mode, unable to be at ease or relaxed. Your body is pumping a lot of cortisol, stress vibes into your bloodstream, your will have anxiety, panic attack, irregular heartbeat or fast pace heartbeat. You probably notice it too with your breathing becoming shallow and quick rather than long and deep. With too much Cortisol that is not flushed out of your system your stress hormones then increased to be ACTH. This makes your face flushed, and your body and immune system goes out of whack. You will start to feel lethargic, drained and exhausted very easily, as your GABA neurons sends signals to your body to perceive danger and the cortisol stress hormones increased but your mind is unable to discern the state of danger you are in, because on face value, everything is fine. People were being extremely kind, generous, they show respect, and so much good manners is everywhere around. But the underlying blatant truth is the hardest fact. Its was all for show. It was a fake environment that is staged to build “bond”, “oxytocin”. and “trust”. This is where you are trauma bonded to the person who is targeting you.
The Idealization phase is where the trauma bond begins. You are being hooked to build a strong bond that is false. As you are open to being yourself, being happy, being unique, and being openly authentic. You begin to naturally emit, satisfaction in who you are, and what you are all about. Your Serotonin and Dopamine are dancing around in the air, with good and high vibes. The Idealization phase and Trauma bonding is a situation where unconsciously as a target of a nasty social politics, you may be tricked into trusting a fake friend and start a false relationship. You may foresee that this relationship is not quite as it looks versus how it feels. You get utterly confused with your friendship with the person. If its not a person and a group of people, you may be dazed to what is going on with the environment you are shining, being yourself in. You are fooled into believing you are welcome into a group of people, an environment and a situation where you build bond with people who are falsely invested in watching you shine, fulfill your dreams, step into your authentic power. You are falsely accepted into an environment, and false idealized and admired as well as realizing that you are hooked into a trauma bond of guilt feelings when you excitedly speak about yourself, your desire and your dreams. Your group will look down on you, the person who use to love listening to you share your excitements and achievements starts to put your happiness down, and you start searching for clues of what is wrong. Your benefit of a doubt and projection of your virtue is taken for granted as the people surrounding you stopped idealizing you when you don’t recognise you are not in the right group to shine, right environment to flourish, and the right space to prosper. Your environment becomes toxic, and you can’t bear to accept the facts that the idealization phase is a false acceptance and a false connection. People in your surrounding might get upset, might take things personally, everyone you may look at may find faults in you and try to pull you down, tear you down, and cripple all of your unique strengths and use you as a punching bag for their lack of ambition, commitment and attempt to steal your dreams and desires.
You stopped feeling good. Your Serotonin crash. Every time you think or feel about what use to makes you happy, it brings you sudden shock, stress and pain in your gut. You are not able to shine your power. Not able to shine in your unique identity. Not able for anything you love. The people surrounding you stop caring, stop wondering, stop wanting to know what you are doing, they just didn’t like you anymore. You took it personally, you try to figure what is wrong. But you still didn’t get the clue. The environment was unhappy of your beauty, your shine, your skills and your abilities that surpasses theirs. Envy roams free. Gossip lingers to tear down your reputable image. Friends gang up against you. Social networks refuses to include you. You face rejection after rejection with no idea what is going on. You are not welcome in the group, in the friendship, in the environment that use to accept you.
In order to feel belonged, you start letting go… of your heart and what you love. You try to win back the idealization, the embrace, the support, the emotions you were receiving from the person, the group, the environment. You give up your dream, you give up your stability, you give up your desires, you let go of the comfortable loving space in the walls of your heart and you start to seek the conditional love of others. You start to morph and transform into a people pleaser. You are hooked, trauma bonded. Even though mild and unforeseen, it will take a toll on you in the long term. You will lose ability to care for your needs and your own self. You will start to give attention, time, focus, energy and anything you can in order to keep the person, environment and group of people satisfied and happy. You are trauma bonded to please the people who a while back, refuse to accept you, rejected you, slander you, and defame you and made your heart cry, because you wanted to belong. It is an unconscious pack mentality. Everybody wanted to feel belonged. Ask a crying child rejected by her mother. She would throw her toy just so her mother will give some attention to her. She would be very obedient so her mother would bathe her and look at her. She will give up everything to receive any amount of love, from someone that she looks up to, the only person she perceives as safety and comfort. Her heart and needs become secondary and non-existent as long as she is required to obey a command and meet the demands of her mother, that may uses love, comfort, security and sense of belonging to manipulate her behaviour and obedience skill.
Some childrens are groomed to abandon their heart in order to be obedience so they can feel belong in the family pack and order. Some young childrens are groomed to abandon their heart in order to be part of a popular crowd. Some adults are groomed to abandon their heart in order to be part of the rich and famous. A lot of people are groomed to abandon their heart. People use this as a platform to exchange their soul in order to create a illusion of acceptance, a false sense of security to belong, and the perception that gives them temporary comfort. Little by little, this people are mentally conditioned to separate the ability to discern their independence and stuck in the mode of co-dependency and brainwashed to follow the mass herd mentality of pop culture and acceptance. Rather than finding their unique voice to stand out, shine and be the authentic version of their signature spark in this earth.
Being idealized and having it taken away, removes the significance, the serotonin hormone, a sense of importance and as the hormone crushes down, there is a need to feed the serotonin hormone. An unconscious individual would do the next suggestive primal action to receive it, which is to bend their will to meet the needs of their environment, they are then controlled by their environment in an exchange for the sustaining of serotonin, dopamine and oxytocin. All of this are chemicals produce in the brain when you are mentally healthy or fed with interaction in your environment that sabotages your true well being. You may become a chronic people pleaser, trying to receive compliments, or trying to blend in and fit in in order to secure yourself as part of the crowd. Self sabotaging behaviour is conditioned and groomed to please the surrounding environment that with a secret acknowledgement asks you to renounce your heart, unique vision, unique voice, or anything that makes you stand out and shine and be part of the herd, be normal, be plain, settle in, blend in and don’t stand out. Don’t be attractive or significant beyond others. Obey, submit, and listen. Not having a mind of your own. This shows how the environment does not support creativity, or individuality, and there is some sort of hierarchy or leadership that keeps everyone in the group, or family, or environment to be obedient and submissive.
You lose all spark that makes you unique and different from everyone else, you lose connection to your personal desires and personal needs as well as personal happiness and joy. You become one of the many emotional slaves, obeying the command and need of the environment. To be invisible and blend in until you are needed to give the leader or captain of the ship some ego boost by how they will use you as an emotional punching bag to dump their insecurities, vulnerabilities and false accusations on you. Verbal abuse, Mental abuse, Psychological abuse can happen in an environment where you may have abandon your voice and heart, to feel the false serotonin of being belonged in a packing order of a submissive and obedient mental slaves of your environment. You will stop taking action that makes you stand out. Stop attracting attention that makes you special. Stop achieving just to blend in. The stop button is controlled by your environment that gives you the perspective that if you stand out and receive attraction and attention beyond the reach of others, the jealousy meter goes high and you will be punished. Your ability to understand pleasure or pain starts to be twisted. Instead of going after your happiness and high vibes. You settle into the safer environment where you abandon your unique capabilities in order to not be attacked for being outstanding and the form of insidious rejection that crashes your serotonin. You are being commended for abandoning your heart and congratulated. Every time you choose to act from your heart you are punished and rejected. You learn to abandon your heart since you are young until you are not. Then you are groomed again in order to feel you belonged. If you don’t abandon your heart to fit into the social clique, then you will be punished, rejected and abandoned. Until you have a special answer you can learn in this course. Where you don’t have to give the power of your serotonin and dopamine lying in the hands of the negative environment anymore.
You can keep your serotonin and dopamine high. You can keep your high vibes. Protect it. Shield it. Defend it. Polish it. You can refuse to let other people idealize you then reject you. You don’t have to depend on other people’s approval, and emotional input to tell you that you belong where you stand. You don’t have to depend on other people’s opinions, comments, validation, and permission in order to be who you are. You can protect your high vibes. You can keep being yourself. You can hold your heart high. You can protect your mind from ridiculous sabotaging qualities. You can be unique and stand proud in a society of hungry wolves trying to take a bite of your independence and attempting to erase your unique voice, vision and capabilities. The power to be yourself and stand in your independent mind, vision and heart has got nothing to do with society. It is a relationship between you and your own source of god power. The blessings you carry in your life is yours. Your unique self is blessed in varieties of ways. You can stand proud in your unique identity with no feeling of fear that you will be rejected, ridiculed, and abandoned. Because you will learn to empower your self acceptance, self compliments and sense of belonging.